A Horrible Familiar
by Tiamatio
Summary: It's a lovely morning in Halkeginia and you are a horrible goose.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Today would be the day she would summon her great and powerful familiar. Once she summoned it, everyone would stop mocking her, they'd recognize her prowess as a mage, and they'll finally stop calling her a Zero! These were the thoughts of Louise de la Valliere, a young, pink-haired mage who has seemingly no magical talent whatsoever. Although she had hoped for a strong familiar to summon, she would take anything to prove her worth.

Oh how she would be regretting that wish very soon.

"Alright, is that everyone who has summoned?" The teacher, Jean Colbert, asked. A tan, busty girl next to Louise grinned mischievously before raising her hand.

"Oh, Mr. Colbert! Louise here hasn't summoned yet!"

"W-what?! Why you filthy Zerbst..!" Louise cursed under her breath. The red-haired girl only smiled devilishly.

"Thank you, Miss Kirche. Louise, if you would step up?" Colbert gestured towards Louise, who made her way to the front of the class. This immediately got her classmates muttering.

"Tch, there's that Zero again…"

"Better back up, lest we get exploded as well."

"Just give up Zero!"

"Behave, all of you! Show some tact as nobles, children!" Colbert scolded. He sighed before looking at the girl before him. "Now then Louise, just relax and do as you were taught, okay? You'll be able to summon a familiar, I know so." Louise smiled at the one person who ever believed in her abilities.

"T-thank you, professor. Now then… My servant that existed somewhere in this vast universe, my divine, beautiful, wise, powerful servant, heed my call, I wish from the very bottom of my heart and add to my guidance and appear!"

_**BOOOM!**_

A large explosion sounded throughout the courtyard, forcing the students to cover their faces from the smoke. Almost immediately, the jeering began.

"Founder Almighty, Zero, are you trying to kill us?!"

"Another failure, just like you!"

"Just go home already! You're nothing but trouble!"

"Silence! I will not tolerate any more of this nonsense!" Colbert shouted at the students, shutting them up. Louise however, was staring dejectedly at the explosion she caused. Another explosion, just as always. Maybe she should go home… Just let herself be married off to some random noble to preserve her family's name and their stand-

"Hjönk!"

"Huh?" The dust cleared, revealing… a pure white goose. It was as basic as they come for geese in general, basic expression and all. But something about the look on its face screamed that it was planning something. What that something was would be for it to know and no one else to find out; unless it was too late of course. "I-Is that a goose?"

Louise's apprehension towards the new arrival quickly morphed into happiness. She summoned a familiar! It actually worked! But… why a goose? Sure it looked pretty but was it majestic like a dragon or manticore? Not really. She then stopped before turning back towards her teacher. She opened her mouth to say something but decided against it.

"Er, Miss Louise? If you would complete the ritual please?" Colbert asked kindly.

"O-Oh, of course…" She turned to face the goose, who was currently stretching out its wings and taking in the change of scenery. "Hello, uh… Goose? I'll find a better name later, but from now on, you'll be my familiar, okay?"

"Hjönk?" It tilted its head at her, not really understanding her words. Louise sighed before pointing her wand at the waterfowl.

"Pentagon of the Five Elemental Powers, grant your blessings upon this creature and bind it as my familiar." She then bent down and kissed the goose on its bill. The goose looked at her curiously before honking in pain. It turned its right wing around and found the source of its pain, which almost instantly subsided. It would seem that some strange markings were engraved onto it. Taking interest in the marks, it flapped its wings, as if showing them off. Louise giggled at the little show her new familiar was giving her before petting it.

"Oh wow, that is golden. A boring old goose for boring old Zero!" A foppish blonde boy called out. Some students laughed alongside him, but the water mages of the crowd looked on thoughtfully, namely one Montmorency. Geese were usually attributed to water due to their affinity to the lakes, so maybe the former Zero had some standing as a Water Mage that couldn't control her magic at the very least. Well, at least she thought a little higher of her than before. Although, that really isn't saying much due to the extremely low bar Louise had in her mind in the first place.

After some harsh exchanges between Louise and her classmates, she and her goose went to her bedroom, where it immediately found solace in the bundle of hay she put aside for a familiar the night before. Louise smiled at her new companion before getting serious.

"Alright, let me explain some ground rules, er… I didn't give you a name yet, did I?"

"Hjönk."

"Right… How about… Anser? How does that sound?"

"Hjönk Hjönk!"

"Glad you like it Anser! What a good…" She picked up the goose and looked at its underside for a second before continuing. "Boy! Now then, onto some ground rules! I am your master and you're my familiar, so I expect you to listen to me when I give you orders, okay?" Anser simply picked at his feathers, prompting a sigh out of Louise. "Right, a goose… Look, just… try to stay out of trouble, okay?" Once those words were spoken, a trigger went off in Anser's mind that made him honk excitedly before settling down in seconds, but if you looked carefully, there was a horrible glint in his eyes that spoke volumes of what he would bring.

Louise shook her head at her goose's antics and changed into her nightgown. She then gave her old clothes to Anser, who surprisingly held them all in his beak. "What a good goose. Now go find a housemaid and ask her to clean those clothes for me. Or, as best as a goose can do."

"Hjönk!"

"How can you… nevermind, look just go get those clothes washed. Afterwards, come back here for bed." Anser nodded as he waddled out the room, clothes in bill. Once out of earshot, Louise sighed. "What an odd goose…"

* * *

Anser made his way through the school with the clothes he was given. Truth be told, he had no idea where he was headed, but that never stopped him before. True, this new place was far different from the village he was accustomed to, but it wouldn't deter him from his goal. This was weird, as his mental To-Do list seemed to be edited slightly when he was branded as a familiar. A new item popped up, one that took priority over all else:

_**Help Louise in whatever way possible (ends upon death). **_

Now Anser never really thought about death before, it was never on his mind actually. He preferred living a life full of mischief and chaos, just as he liked it. He found it odd for such an item on his To-Do list but shook it off. It wouldn't do him much worrying about it he supposed. Besides, this was new territory! New places to explore, new items to horde, and most importantly, new people to terrorize! Oh, how fun! Speaking of, here's one now!

A black-haired maid was busy at work, piling laundry into a cart when she spotted Anser. She giggled at the sight of the goose wandering around with clothes in his mouth and gingerly accepted them from him. He honked at her as she went back to work.

"Thank you Mister Goose! I assume Lady Valliere gave you those clothes to wash didn't she?" An affirmative honk made her laugh. "At least she let you know to find a maid to help you. Well then, I must be on my way. Oh, and before I forget, my name is Siesta! A pleasure to meet you Mister Goose!" A happy honk made her smile as she departed.

What a kind lady, it would be a shame if those keys of her went missing, however. A real pity. But before Anser could steal anything from her, an arrogant laugh sound from around the corner. And almost immediately, a new To-Do list item popped up in his head:

_First Impressions are important, get some cologne!_

Anser moved around the corner and found a foppish blonde boy flirting with a younger brown-haired girl. The goose cared very little for human romance and relationships, as he much rather cause discourse rather than mend it. These two were no exceptions. With stalking skills that could rival a house cat's, he maneuvered his way to an ample hiding spot, close enough to listen to the blonde spout sweet nothings into the brunette's ear.

"Katie, my sweet dear Katie… how I would love nothing more than to-"

"Hjönk!"

"BRIMIR ABOVE!"

"O-Oh my, Lord Guiche, are you alright?"

"I'm fine, thank you. Just got spooked by that noise… huh?"

"What is the matter, Lord Guiche?"

"The present you gave me, it's gone!"

"Eh?!"

And with the swiftness of a cat, Anser was running off, cologne in tow. How despicably easy that was! All he had to do was-

"Hey, there you are! Bring that back!" Guiche cried, catching sight of Anser. It seemed like he accidentally let him catch up. Nothing a little chase can't fix! Anser ran off into the halls with an irate Guiche chasing him down. "Look Goose, you don't understand, Montmorency CANNOT find out about this! Just give that back to me and we'll be golden, okay?" Oho? Someone mustn't see this, should they? What a shame, for him that is.

_First Impressions are important, get some cologne! -Done!_

_Expose the playboy._

How delightfully devilish of him. Anser made a mad dash into the open clearing of the courtyard. Guiche sighed in relief, believing Montmorency to still be asleep at this hour of the night. "Hey, Goose. I don't care what you do with that cologne, just don't show it to Montmorency, okay?" Guiche called out to Anser. He waved off him off before retreating back inside the castle. Well then, guess that solves that problem. But where, or who is this Montmorency person? Time for an adventure! However, a ribbit to his side stopped him.

A frog looked at him inquisitively, to which Anser returned the look. The frog croaked a bit before adjusting itself to sit upright on the lily pad it was on.

"Ribbit."

"Hjönk? Honk honk, hjönk."

"Rib ribbit?"

"Hjönk. Hjönk honk?"

"Rib."

"Hjönk!"

Now that's some good information right there. It would seem that this frog is named Robin, Montmorency's familiar. She described her master as a girl with blonde hair in drills. Very helpful for later. After conversing a bit with her, the newly acquainted familiars said their goodbyes as Anser ventured more into the clearing. Here, he found more familiars roaming around, as they were just too restless as their first night as familiars. From here, Anser made fast friends with a Fire Salamander named Flame, who showed him something grand.

"Sssaah Sah!"

"Hjönk Hjönk Hjönk!"

"Sah sah saah! Ssiisss sah!"

"Hjönk honk honk!"

What a guy! Flame had found a stash burrow, and although it had boring junk in it like discarded vases, such a humble beginning was all Anser needed to start his hoard anew. He placed the cologne he found in the burrow before waddling away, thanking his new friend for the hiding place as he went back to Louise. Flame, however, wanted to walk with him, as his master, Kirche, lived right next door. The two familiars walked back to their respective dorms, talking in whatever language they spoke in gleefully, before saying their goodnights.

"Sah."

"Honk."

With a few taps on the door, the room door opened to reveal a slightly groggy Louise. Around the same time, Kirche opened her room door to let her salamander in. Louise glared at her rival, who smiled at her before they went back inside. Once inside, Louise sat on her bed whilst Anser settled himself on his.

"What took you so long, Anser?"

"Hjönk."

"I'll just assume you got lost and wandered around. I also see you made friends with Zerbst's familiar." Her eye twitched at the name of the other girl before sighing. "Oh well, our rivalry shouldn't concern you two. I don't mind you hanging out with Flame, just try not to get carried by the whims of that Germanian devil, you hear?"

"Honk!"

"Hmph, how quaint, you share my sentiments. Now let's rest up, we have a big day tomorrow."

Little did Louise know, a new item appeared on our favorite goose's To-Do list:

_Expose the playboy._

_Steal Kirche's wand during her favorite pass time._

**Ah yeah, Goose in Halkeginia, what will he do? Cause maximum chaos I hope! I gave him a name because Louise isn't the type of person who wouldn't name her new pet or name them something as simple as Goose. So I went with the simplified Latin version of Goose I found on Google Translate. And despite Goose causing max havoc for the humans, the animals would be like friendly NPCs or even quest givers to our feathered fellow. It's an interesting take I'll enjoy writing. Leave a review if you liked the story! I'll post whenever I can get a chance, since I'm working a lot now. Sucks I can't do strikethrough text on here or else I would've done that instead of putting (Done) next to each completed task. Lame!**


	2. Chapter 2

**And thus, the honking begins anew.**

**Chapter 2**

"Mmm, five more minutes…"

"Hjönk!"

"Eh?" Louise awoke with a start, sitting upright to find a pure white goose sitting on top of her. She was confused at first until she remembered the events of the day before. "I really did summon you then, huh?" She petted the goose endearingly before getting up. She got dressed for the day and motioned for her familiar to come along. "Today is the Day of the Void, so we have all day to get to know each other, Anser. You wait out in the courtyard for me, I'll be back soon."

And with that, Louise went into the cafeteria, leaving Anser to his own devices. Good, now he can start with his day. Anser left to find his hiding hole until he was greeted by Flame and a new companion. The new arrival was a large, blue lizard with wings. The beast bent down to introduce itself to Anser.

"Kyuuu!"

"Honk?"

"Kyu Kyuun?"

"Hjönk."

"Kyuun!"

The beast was a dragon known as Sylphid, and she appeared to be very childish. How endearing, he thought. Anser chatted with them for a bit before waddling off to his burrow, where he retrieved a bottle of cologne. He stuffed it away in his wing for safekeeping for now, as he heard Louise call out for him.

" Hjönk!"

Anser made his way out the brush to find his master waiting for him by the courtyard's entrance. Louise and Kirche seemed to be bickering as per usual whilst Sylphid's master was sitting beside Kirche, reading a book. The other two girls had their familiars by them as Anser made his way back to Louise.

"Ah, there you are Anser! Are you ready for today?"

"Honk!"

"Your goose may seem fair to you, Louise, but my Flame is far superior to yours!"

"Ssah?"

"Be quiet, Zerbst! Before I make you silent!"

"Oh my, no need to get so riled up Louise, I am merely stating facts!" The two girls began arguing again, in which Anser took as his cue. He lowered his head to be level with Kirche's hip and lined himself up. With the expertise of a master thief, he swiped her wand. And because she was too busy toying with Louise, she didn't even notice. Anser backed up slowly before turning to a full-on sprint. Kirche laughed at this display while Louise tried to call him back. "Oh, how like you, Zero. You can't even get your familiar to stay by your side with your constant nagging…"

"Tch, more like my familiar had enough of you fouling the atmosphere!"

"Eh?"

"What, cat got your tongue?" Louise sneered. Kirche had a look of confusion on her face as she patted her hip.

"My wand…"

"Huh?"

"My wand is missing!"

"Ha! You must've left it on your nightstand after one of your little late night 'escapades', Zerbst!"

"I always make sure to pick it up even after those. I had it in my hand earlier too, where had it gone..?"

The girls continued bickering at each other. All the while, Anser had already made his retreat.

_Steal Kirche's wand during her favorite pass time. -Done!_

Too easy! Even if she were to give chase, it's too late now. He had already hid it in the bushes. Once she gave up looking for it, he'd store it away for his hoard. That's the plan at least. Or it was until he spotted a certain foppish blondie. Anser hid in the bushes by him as he found him talking to a blonde girl with drills… wait that sounds like Montmorency. Ohoho, now things are getting interesting. He turned around and spotted the brunette girl from last night looking around desperately. Oh this day can't get any better, can it?

"Hmm, where is he…?"

"Hjönk!"

"Oh! I didn't see you there, Mister Goose. Do you happen to know where Lord Guiche is?"

"Hjönk hjönk!" Anser motioned for her to follow. The girl happily followed him. Upon reaching their destination, Katie was heartbroken to what she saw, Guiche flirting with another girl.

"Lord Guiche, how could you!"

"W-what in the-" Guiche was shocked by seeing Katie out here, only to look frightened by Montmorency's dark expression. "Wait, Montmorency my love, it's not what it looks like! I-I don't even know her!"

"But my gift from last night…"

"What gift? I don't remember receiving anything of the sort from you!"

Ah, playing dumb, are we? Well, it would be a shame if something came up suddenly to foil your plans. Anser reached from underneath his wing and pulled out a rather fancy looking bottle of cologne. Katie and Montmorency gasped at the sight of it while Guiche paled at the object. Katie ran up to Guiche with the bottle in hand and had tears streaming down her face. Montmorency was also on the brink of tears, being cheated on by her boyfriend.

"You jerk!" The two girls shouted at him before slapping him on the face simultaneously. The two girls then ran off crying. Guiche sat there stunned, as did the other nobles who were watching the whole scene transpire. Then the students began to laugh at his expense, causing him to glare at the cause of this ordeal. What he saw a goose that somehow managed to look absolutely smug and proud of his actions.

_Expose the playboy. -Done!_

"Y-you… Have you realized what you've done, you horrible goose?!"

"Hjönk!"

"Grr… I'll teach you to break the hearts of fair maidens! I, Guiche de Gramont," He pointed his wand at Anser. "Challenge you to a duel!" The crowd was silent until someone spoke up.

"Isn't dueling prohibited?"

"True, but only between nobles. There's nothing against dueling a familiar, now is there?"

"But… he's just a goose."

"No matter! I'll put him in his place just the same! Now, what say you, goose?"

_New To-Do list item:_

_Humiliate the Casanova._

Anser stared at the business end of Guiche's wand for a second. Then he simply plucked it out of his hands. The entire crowd was silent, not registering what had just transpired. Guiche stood in exasperation for a second before fuming in anger.

"You dare mock me?! The son of General Gramont?! Return my wand this instant, you horrible goose!"

"Hjönk!"

The crowd of students bursts out laughing as Anser lowered his head and ran between Guiche's legs as he went to grab his wand back. With a hop, Anser took advantage of Guiche bending over and landed on his back. From there, he started honking and whacking him over the head with his own wand. Guiche was yelling all the while, unable to defend himself due to lack of a wand. After dirtying the poor boy for a bit, Anser leapt off his head and made a mad dash towards a stream. Anser then swam across the stream and turned to face Guiche once on the other side.

The students all look on as Guiche was staring down the goose before him. The laughter continued as Anser began taunting Guiche with his own wand. Guiche made his way to attempt to swim across the river until Anser stretched his neck and held the wand out towards the river. Guiche stopped dead in his tracks before slowly trying to deescalate the poor situation.

"N-Now, er… Anser, Zero calls you? Yeah, listen, just put down the wand and I'll call off the duel. I won't even come after you or Louise for this, I'll just forgive and forget, okay? I'll even claim full responsibility for my actions, just please, PLEASE, don't drop my wand into the-"

_**Sploosh!**_

Anser let go of the wand, leaving behind a shocked crowd and an exasperated Guiche.

"I-but-you… Oh Founder Almighty, Father is going to have my hide for this…"

_Humiliate the Casanova -Done!_

Guiche fell to his knees and sulked. It would seem that it was Anser who had won this duel. How utterly embarrassing. Anser let out a victorious honk as he swam back over the river and flaunted proudly to the students behind a still catatonic Guiche. From there, a familiar pink head made her way to the front of the crowd only to find a rather proud looking goose looking right back at her.

"What in Founder's name…?"

"Oh Zero, it was hilarious! Your familiar humiliated Guiche in front of everyone! He tried to duel your familiar and ended up losing his wand AND dignity!"

"I-er… what?"

"Your familiar is something else Zero! Maybe he'll rub off onto you and help you actually do something right. He sure has!"

"What kind of compliment is that?" Louise shook off the half insult half praise and knelt down to meet her goose, who honked gleefully at his mess. "Well, I can see you had a lot of fun today, didn't you?"

"Hjönk!"

"Heh, alright then. I'll treat you to some bread then. I'd say with everything you did for me today you deserve it." With a delighted honk, Anser followed after his master. All the while, a certain bald teacher was observing the scene from a distance. He raised a hand to his chin as he observed the goose's brand slowly stop glowing.

"Those markings… no, it can't be. The idea is so preposterous like anyone would believe that a Goose would be the Gandalfr…"

* * *

A little later in the afternoon, Louise had gone to her classes, letting Anser come along with her. Currently, they were sitting in the middle of a lecture on how the magic system of their world worked. Anser had no interest in such things as he simply picked at his feathers to pass the time. Eventually, the teacher had called out Louise to do a spell for the class. Almost immediately, the students went for cover while trying to warn the teacher.

"Please Miss, Louise cannot cast a spell for the life of her, just let someone else do it!"

"Oh no, here we go again!"

"Why does she have to do this?!"

Anser saw his master tense up at the insults, struggling to keep composure. Then, the strange To-Do list item in his mind seemingly pulsed in red. Looks like he could help out here, but how? Maybe… yes that can work. Anser slowly made his way down the desks until reaching one very close to Louise. All he needed was the cue…

"Now Louise, just focus and transmute the brass into stone."

"O-Of course… Well, here goes… Transmute!" Her wand glowed at the tip, glowing up larger and larger before shrinking at a fast rate. And in the split second, before her glow could fizzle out, Anser acted.

"HJÖNK!"

"KYAA!"

_**BTOOM!**_

"Anser! What was that for?! You made me-" The shocked gasps from her classmates stopped her from scolding her familiar as she slowly looked over to the brass before her. It was perfectly transmuted into stone, with some tell-tale signs that an explosion occurred, albeit a small one.

"Excellent Miss Valliere! It seems your classmates worries were unfounded." The teacher went back to her lesson as Louise quietly returned to her seat. Her classmates were staring at her incredulously, as if they've witnessed a miracle. Louise couldn't blame them; it might as well have been. All her spells prior have been nothing but explosions, but because Anser spooked her, this one did. Did her familiar know something she didn't? She stared back down at her familiar's goosey face, who only honk back curiously.

"What an odd goose indeed…"

* * *

It was evening and Louise had retired to her bedroom to mull over the events of the day. She let Anser roam around as he pleased so she can be alone with her thoughts. Her familiar graciously accepted the invitation and waddled off. Now exploring the halls, he happened upon a certain Siesta again, this time she was pushing a tray of food.

"Honk?"

"Hmm? Ah, Mister Goose! Or Anser I should say. Hello again." She greeted kindly. "You know, the servants around here are happy that you showed that noble what for. And it was pretty funny listening to the students recount it. Thank you for humbling him, Anser."

"Hjönk."

"Well then, you seem like the curious type. Would you like a tour of the school? I know it's not much, but it's the least I can do to thank you."

"Hjönk Hjönk!"

"Okay then, follow me!"

Thanks to the kind maid, Anser was able to mentally map out the entirety of the school. He decided to let this person off the hook. They were kind enough to not get harassed. For now at least. After being given a few pieces of bread, Siesta went back to her chores, leaving Anser to waddle around some more. From here, he met an old, wise white mouse who introduced himself as Chu Chu.

"Squeak squeak squeak."

"Hjönk honk?"

"Squeak, squeak squeak!"

"Hjönk… honk honk."

"Squeak!"

_New To-Do list item!_

_Steal the secretary's panties._

Well, this shouldn't be too hard. Chu Chu was having a hard time finding them himself as Miss Longueville had set up traps to prevent the mouse from entering. But he deduced that a goose would have no trouble at all getting through. Anser failed to find the logic in the perverted mouse's logic but shook it off. He had some mischief to get into.

Chu Chu led him to where the secretary's office was, letting him decide what the best course of action was from here. Afterwards, he was told to meet back up by the broom closet by the Headmaster's Office. Once the white mouse left, Anser concocted his plan.

* * *

Miss Longuevuille's day could've gone better in her opinion. She could've gone without that massive pile of paperwork that came in earlier, but it was no matter now. She could finally relax and get some shut-eye. She went to unlock her room door and went inside, not noticing the wooden block that slid its way to keep it open. Longueville changed out of her work clothes and into her nightgown before flopping onto her bed, tiredness scrawled all over her face. She closed her eyes, and in that moment, a certain white goose crept inside the room.

Anser maneuvered his way through the room silently, looking for her wash bin. Upon spotting it, he found his prize hanging off its edge. With a tug, he yanked the underwear off the basket… along with the rest of the basket. Longuevuille's eyes flicked open wondering what was the cause of the sound. Anser used the slight moment he had to duck underneath her bed, hiding away carefully. Longueville quickly grabbed her wand and looked around the room for signs of an intruder. Her eyes eventually fell on the fallen wash bin and sighed.

"I really should've gotten someone to pick those up then. Must've been overflowing. She picked up the clothes and situated the basket back to normal before lying back down. Anser had his prize, now all he needed to do was get out of the room without being noticed. He found a small capsule of some kind under the bed and got an idea. He threw it carefully so it bounced to the other side of the room. "What in the…"

The moment Longuevuille got up to pick up the object, Anser quickly waddled out the room, kicking the wedge into her room as he left. He then dashed towards the entrance to the headmaster's office, where the old mouse was waiting patiently.

"Squee Squeak?"

"Hjönk." Anser placed the underwear down for the mouse to see. Upon studying the garment for a bit, the mouse nodded and thanked him.

_Steal the secretary's panties. -Done!_

Chu Chu let him keep the panties, as he only needed to see them. Anser accepted the item graciously as he left to place his new find in his collection. After placing his newest addition in his burrow, he went for a nice swim in the pond. It was a nice night out and he's even able to get a nice view of the… moons? That's odd. Isn't there only one white moon? Why are there two? And one is red while the other is blue. What a strange place this place is…

After swimming around some more, Anser made his way back inside the school. On his way back to bed, he began mentally listing down new things to do the next morning. Oh, what a delightful day tomorrow will be. Delightfully devilish indeed.

_New To-Do list items:_

_Enter the cafeteria_

_Have a nice, balanced breakfast_

_(Bring to the courtyard: Sandwiches, apple, jam, pancakes, syrup)_

_Make the servant spill his tea_

_Make the head cook lose his hat._

_Get some cutlery._

_Lock someone in the broom closet_

**Hey everyone! Glad you're enjoying the story! I'm having a lot of fun writing how Goose interacts with the residents of the FoZ universe. And he's well… he's Goose, what more do I have to say? Anyways, as usual, leave a review if you like the story and thanks for the support! Until next time!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Glad everyone is enjoying this silly story! Fun fact: The original name of the story was "Untitled Familiar Fanfiction"!**

**Chapter 3**

The day had begun as usual for Louise. She would sleep in only for Anser to honk at her to get up. She refused, opting to go back under the covers and ignore him. Said goose had enough of her antics and did the only reasonable thing he could do. Anser snatched up the end piece of her comforter and yanked it off her bed. Louise sat up with a yelp, glaring at her familiar who was happy she decided to wake up. She silently fumed as she got ready for the day, cursing her familiar for waking her up so early. If Anser heard her, he most likely didn't care. He had a big day planned and he didn't need his master dawdling around first thing in the morning. It was a lovely morning after all, and he was a horrible goose.

Louise and Anser made their way to the courtyard, where she told him to stay here as she went to go get her food. He watched her until she went inside. Great, time to get on with the day. First things first, where's his entrance? Anser surveyed the courtyard until he found his opening: Siesta carrying a cart of plates into the cafeteria. He tossed a stone past her as a distraction, which she easily took.

"What was that?" Anser climbed into the cart while she was occupied, the maid none the wiser. "Oh well, I should go on with my chores…" And just like that, Anser had infiltrated the building. Just in time too, as Louise had gotten up to leave with only a sandwich in hand. If he remembered correctly, she would be going to her usual spot underneath her favorite tree to eat. Good, he really didn't need her foiling his plans.

_Enter the cafeteria. -Done!_

Oh, now where to start… Well, the easiest option first. When no one was looking, Anser hopped out of Siesta's cart and dove underneath the tables. From here, he crept around until he found a boy who was too preoccupied with his friends to notice his knife was missing.

_Get some cutlery. -Done!_

Time for some mayhem, Anser thought deviously. He held the knife in his beak as he spotted his newest target. It would seem that peace was never an option. What a shame. A servant was dutifully pouring out the tea for a noble when Anser snuck up upon him. He rose up until he was level with the man's ear, the servant and noble blissfully unaware of what was happening.

"Hjönk!"

_**Splash!**_

_Make the servant spill his tea. -Done!_

"GAAAHH!" The boy cried out as the scalding hot tea was poured all over him.

"Oh Brimir Above, I am so sorry about that milord, I was startled and-"

"No excuses! I should have you flogged for this blatant disrespect of my name, you bumbling buffoon!" The student then took notice of the goose behind him, his fury unrelenting. "And you! You were the one who made this fool spill his tea, weren't you!?"

"Hjönk!"

"I'll make a stew out of you, you filthy-"

"Hjönk Hjönk!" Anser did not like that response one bit. With the reflexes that would put a trained assassin to shame, he dove at the boy, knife in beak. The boy let out a girlish shriek as the killer goose was now chasing him down with a knife. Neither noticed the runes in his wing glowing all the while. The other students and servants came to find out what was the commotion and quickly found out that a goose was loose in the cafeteria. The response was anger from the irate servants and laughter from the students. The poor student Anser was chasing was getting desperate as he gained the ire of the goose.

"I'm sorry! I regret my word choice! PLEASE SPARE ME!" The boy found a door ahead, hoping for it to be a safe haven. He quickly ran inside and shut himself in. He sighed in relief, knowing he was gone from the goose's wrath. He turned to continue, only to bump into a broom. "A broom closet. Well, that's not too bad…" Suddenly, he felt something crawl onto his shoulder. He slowly craned his neck to see what it was and found a spider resting on his shoulder. A mother spider... with all 1000+ eggs on her back.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" The poor boy screamed as he made his to open the closet, only to learn he was locked in. His shrieks were being heard from the outside, where a certain goose was still running rampant. And in the chase for the horrible goose, he kicked down a broomstick that landed on top of the closet's lock, which meant the boy in the closet was stuck.

_Lock someone in the broom closet. -Done!_

Now where to next? Oh, the servant from earlier opened the door to the cooking room! Guess the student wasn't lying earlier, he really is an idiot. Anser stretched out his wings and made a beeline into the kitchen. From there, he knocked over some pots and pans as the cooks and servants tried to catch him. He then caught the ire of the head cook, Marteau. He had an extremely angry expression on his face as he lunged for Anser.

The goose simply leapt back a bit, letting the big man tumble down. He was about to get up when Anser grabbed a rolling pin from the counter and clonked him over the head with it. With Marteau out of commission, he snagged his hat and placed it upon his head.

_Make the head cook lose his hat. -Done!_

The servants looked on in horror as the goose brought back out his knife and brandished it at them, forcing them to back away from the violent bird.

"Hjönk!" That was a warning. All servants huddled to the back wall as the goose began stuffing a wicker basket full of breakfast foods before leaving. The servants waited a bit, making sure the goose was gone. From there it was a cacophony of voices trying to find order in chaos.

It was a break to the courtyard now. But first, he needed to shake everyone off his tail. And off in the distance, he found the perfect plan. Just a little goosey magic and he'll have everyone hoodwinked. Oh how dastardly!

* * *

Louise was contently eating breakfast at her usual spot when she spotted Anser waddling over the hill. Truth be told, she was thinking about her familiar a lot lately. He seemed to care for her greatly as well as putting those who wronged her in the past in their place. She found the situation with Guiche hysterical and assumed it was he who stole Kirche's wand. She wouldn't reprimand him on either account; those two had it a long time coming. Rumor has it that Guiche is still begging his father to send a replacement. How hilarious.

Anser waddled up to her with a basket filled with breakfast items, mostly everything Louise didn't get.

"You brought these all for me, Anser?"

"Hjönk." Louise smiled warmly at her familiar, who placed the wicker basket behind some bushes for the time being. Louise motioned for him to come closer, to which he then hopped into her lap. She giggled a bit as she petted the goose, blissfully unaware of his actions earlier.

"You know," She started. "All my life, I was told I was a failure at magic, and that no amount of teaching would help me. Over the years, I think I began to accept that as fact and began to lose hope as well… But then you came into my life, Anser. You were my first success. And then that led to another one back in the classroom. Had you not interrupted my spell towards the end, I am certain it would've been another explosion. Thank you, Anser, for everything you've done for me."

"Hjönk…" Anser nuzzled his head on his master's cheek. It was strange, normally he wouldn't have cared about the feelings of a regular human girl, but this one he felt like he had to protect. Was it the strange markings on his wings? Or the strange demand on his mental list? Wouldn't do much good mulling over it now though. Right now, his master needed comfort, and he would have to be that comfort. He didn't have to be horrible all the time. To her at least.

_Have a nice, balanced breakfast. -Done!_

"There you are you piece of work!" A voice cut the silence. Louise looked up and found an irate student. He was drenched from head to toe, his face was red, and he looked like he was on the verge of tears.

"Oliver? What are you doing here? And who are you calling a piece of work?!"

"That dang goose in your hands, Zero!"

"Anser? But he's been with me the entire time."

"Hjönk?"

"Don't play dumb with me! That beast made a servant spill tea on me, chased me with a knife, and then locked me in a broom closet filled with spiders! I HATE SPIDERS!" The poor boy was getting redder by the second. "I had some water mages douse me to get the spiderlings off, but it was 10 minutes of pure torture!"

"Yeesh, that sounds rough. But Anser couldn't have been the one to do that. He was eating breakfast with me the entire time. I don't appreciate you accusing my familiar of something he didn't commit."

"Oh yeah? What do you expect me to believe, that another goose showed up and caused a ruckus, ruining our lovely morning?!"

"Sir Frant!" A servant called out.

"What is it?!"

"We spotted the culprit!"

"Yes, he's right in front of me!"

"No, not that goose sir! The goose from earlier is swimming away as we speak!"

"WHAT?!"

"Oh? Let's go see for ourselves then, shall we Anser?"

"Hjönk!"

* * *

Sure enough, the servants watched as a white goose wearing a chef's hat and wielding a knife was swimming down the river, now only a small figure in the distance. Oliver fumed in anger at his tormentor getting away while the servants tried to reassure him that they will not fail to capture the goose again. Louise was just glad to see that Anser was innocent. And all the while, the goose in question wished he was able to express human emotions properly so he could smirk evilly.

A little bit after exiting the cafeteria, he had spotted a false goose floating in the pond. He assumed it was put up to attract others or to appease him. Either way, it worked out for him easily. Flame marched over just in time to find Anser struggling to get the statue out of the pond. Their combined strength pulled it out of the pond and they dragged it over to the stream. Flame wondered what was the purpose of the task, to which Anser only gave a curt answer. Flame didn't really care too much, just eager to help his friend in need.

Once in the stream, the two familiars worked to doll up the decoy. Flame helped tie the hat onto its head while Anser slid the knife into its mouth accordingly. With one strong push from both of them, the decoy was off. They ran away from the scene after Anser let out a honk to alert his pursuers, knowing the decoy was too far gone for them to reach.

"Ssah sah sah?"

"Honk Hjönk."

"Ssss… Sah sah. Sah ssiss Sah!"

"Hjönk hjönk honk!"

Flame had already known that his friend would be collecting a lot of stuff, so he asked Sylphid earlier to remove the dam blocking the river from flowing into the burrow. With the dam gone, anything that flowed into the river would make its way back to his stash. Flame reassured his friend that the water would merely pool into a reservoir as the items in the current would simply float in the reservoir. Anser accepted that response and made haste, which Flame's statement proved true.

Happy with how well things turned out, Anser neatly organized his rather fair collection. He then grabbed his wicker basket and set off to find his master. All the while, his pursuers were chasing a fake. And even if someone suspected him, the sight of the fake goose would instantly change their mind. Unfortunately for the students and servants, the game was rigged from the start, and Anser had all the right cards.

* * *

"Are you certain, Professor Colbert?"

"Absolutely. I double-checked my notes and everything. I even got a chance to observe his wing earlier with Miss Valliere's permission."

"Still… what you could be suggesting goes well beyond the realm of blasphemy. You would be tortured to death for implying this!"

"Yet my mind still craves for more information… I will not rest until I figure out why and how a goose of all creatures bears the markings of the legendary Gandalfr…"

As the Headmaster and bald professor spoke, Miss Longueville was eavesdropping for a bit before snickering.

"The Gandalfr as a Goose? What foolishness…" She then turned to face a vault before her. "It matters not. I'll find a way in here, and I WILL take that Staff. It belongs to me, and no Gandalfr or whatever shall stop me…" She walked away, reverting back to her secretary persona. However, a certain white mouse heard everything, but he wasn't able to see who was talking. But he knew just the right person, or fowl, for the job.

"Squee, squeak squeak. Squee squee Squeak!"

"…Hjönk."

"Squeak!"

_New To-Do List items:_

_Find a way into the Academy Vault_

_Secure the Staff of Destruction_

_Capture the thief_

_Steal some treasures_

Admittedly, that last part was for himself, but Chu Chu didn't need to know that. All the old mouse wanted was for someone to prevent this thief, whoever it may be, from taking the coveted Staff of Destruction. The name alone sounds like it'll be a blast to use. Anser decided to wait until tomorrow to find out what to do. For now, he'll need a good night's sleep. It's not every day one becomes a Secret Agent.

**And another chapter done! Sorry for no post all day, I work 8-hour shifts, so it's night when I get home. I'm glad that I'm writing the Goose accurately. I'll admit, I never actually played Untitled Goose Game, only watched playthroughs here and there. It does look like a fun game, and I'll consider picking it up soon. Constantly thinking about this fic really gets me wanting to play it now. As always, leave a review if you liked the chapter and have a good one!**


	4. Chapter 4

**I know some of you are expecting it, but we shall wait about 1 more chapter before Goose is truly Loose. For now, let's get some other fun moments in, shall we?**

**Chapter 4**

Another morning came around, and because of Anser's constant pestering, Louise has finally gotten used to getting up early. She absolutely loathed her familiar for doing that to her, but she guessed it was in her best interests that she did, so she let him have his victory. It was today that she decided that they needed to go into town for some things, mainly anything that Anser would enjoy as a toy. The goose had no complaints, eager to stretch his wings. And a certain mischievous glint in his eyes betrayed the innocent look he painted for his master.

"Well then, that should be everything… You ready for a carriage ride Anser?"

"Hjönk!"

The two of them began to load up into the carriage when Louise dropped her wand accidentally. When she wasn't looking, Anser nipped one of the horses in its backside while the servants were getting ready to tie her up, causing the mare to reactively send a poor servant flying with a kick. The general assumption was that they accidentally spooked the beast, but Anser laughed inwardly.

_Make a servant go airborne for about 3 seconds. -Done!_

Eventually, the duo made their way into town, where Louise walked around looking for treats and other toys for waterfowl. All the while, Anser was causing all sorts of mischief under her oblivious watch. For instance, he snagged a bag out of a rather wealthy man's hand and discreetly planted it on another, equally wealthy man. He learned quickly about how the nobility treated commoners and despite being a troublemaker, he didn't wish for poor commoners to incur the wrath of a brash noble. He was chaotic sure, but not necessarily evil.

The two wealthy men began bickering bitterly until wands were drawn, causing the crowd to panic and run away from the scene. Anser used the confusion to break away from Louise, who was still busy listening to a shopkeeper to care.

_Start a street brawl. -Done!_

Running through the crowd of commoners, he found out that a pickpocket was attempting to steal people's wallets as they ran away in fear. Now that's not right… those weren't going to him! Quickly, Anser grabbed a fallen hammer from a toolsmith's belt and used the crowd as a distraction to go up upon the rafters of a shop. Upon spotting his target, he jumped off the roof and gracefully landed atop of the pickpocket, slamming the hammer into his head. The man yelped before falling unconscious. The crowd was all too concerned about running away from the cloud of magic to care.

_Stop a thief. -Done!_

From here, Anser found the bag where he carried the wallets and grabbed it. It was surprisingly light, so he made his way out the crowd, bag in bill. The victims would still be looking for their wallets long after Anser made his leave.

_Rake in the big bucks. -Done!_

Now then, he knew that money was valuable, but where could he go with it? Louise was off buying him fun little toys, so he didn't bother with those. Food? No, the servants were more than enough. Then what… why are the runes glowing? And they're beckoning him into a weapon's shop. Normally, a goose would have no need for weaponry, for they are simply geese. But this goose is no ordinary goose, and as such, marched his way into the shop.

The shopkeeper was surprised to see a pure white goose look up at him as if he wanted to do business. He then took notice of the familiar runes and sighed.

"So, I can guess your master wanted you to do some shopping, eh? An' that sack you got is yer money?"

"Hjönk."

"Figures. Well, feel free to browse my selection. My weapons are made to-"

_**CRASH!**_

"HEY HEY HEY HEY! What was that noise?!"

"Hjönk?" Anser was standing over a fallen pile of weapons, some of them were even broken or straight up shattered.

"Uhhh, where is my golden saber?"

"Honk?"

"And why are there shards of weapons there?"

"H…jönk?"

"I JUST FRIGGIN' BOUGHT THAT THING THIS MORNING!"

"Yeah, we know how you did it," A muffled voice came from the pile. "Congratulations, the nobles gave you an offering." The shopkeeper growled in frustration at the new voice as Anser dug out a rather rusty sword from the pile. "Whew, thanks, friend!"

"Honk."

"Now, where was I? Oh, right. That doesn't make you better than me. But you see, no one trusts ME around other swords because I'm a bad risk and I make them look bad all the time. So I have to work to get bought."

"Uhhh… did my sword always look like that or am I just uhh-"

"What, class? Style?" The sword 'talked', its scabbard clattering as it did so. "I don't think so. Thank god I got a hilt transplant… Now, why don't you go back behind your counter and shut up!?"

_**BTOOM!**_

A body barreled past the goose and talking sword and into the shopkeeper, knocking them both unconscious from the explosion.

"Honk honk?"

"Why wouldn't he?" The rusty blade said matter-of-factly. "Anyways, the name's Derflinger, Derf for short. What about you?"

"Hjönk."

"Anser, eh? Well then pard, as goosey as you look, you seem like the right guy to wield me. Pleased to work with ya!"

_Get geared up. -Done!_

_New To-Do List item:_

_Get Derflinger a holster._

"Aw, I'm touched pard. I appreciate it."

"Hjönk?"

"Oh yeah, I dunno how either. But I can see that To-Do list of your as well. Must've been those runes on your wing. Whatever it is, I'm impressed with how much you've got done on it upon entering town. Can't believe there's only three more items before it's complete."

"Honk honk!" Anser flaunted himself pridefully to Derf, who chortled mirthfully.

"Now that's the spirit! Now then, let's find out why that guy was blasted through here…"

"Honk."

"Oh, that was one of the guys from that street brawl you caused?"

"Honk."

"Huh. Well that's one mystery down. You said you have a master right? Let's go find her then. It won't do her any good getting worried for you."

* * *

Louise was getting frantic. She lost sight of Anser when that huge crowd of people ran past to get away from what looked like a duel between mages. She had since gotten everything she needed except her goose. She looked around all over town trying to find her familiar when a large pair of hand covered her eyes and mouth, preventing her from screaming. All she heard was his voice.

"Zehahaha… now this is a head that'll make us live like kings! Tie her up, we'll bargain with whatever family she's from and become millionaires!"

"Aye sir!" Came a unanimous sound from multiple men behind her. Louise was scared, she was so scared she fainted in the man's arms, hearing his terrible laugh as she slipped into unconsciousness.

"Help… me…" were he last thoughts before her eyes went heavy.

* * *

"Hjönk hjönk hjönk!" Anser cried out suddenly, making a beeline towards the woods.

"W-Whoa, something got you spooked partner?!"

"Honk honk hjönk!"

"Tch, your master's in danger huh? Well, that one request on your list in burning a hot red as we speak, so she must be in danger. Although… why don't we test me out and knock out those last 3 items together. Two birds with one stone!"

"…"

"Right, right... poor choice of words. Look, let's focus on saving that master of yours!"

As if on cue, Anser found a bandit camp with Louise tied up to a tree, unconscious. He felt something compel him into instantly going out in the open and fight all 5 men but his natural instincts told him to be pragmatic.

"Let's see," Derf whispered quietly. "We can do 'that'. They have everything set up for it. Plus, we can make it look accidental."

"honk." Without missing a beat, Anser made his move. He slid a medium-sized stone a bit in front of the cart a bandit was leaning on. He surprisingly didn't make a move, allowing Anser to waddle past and throw a pebble at his head. The guard spun around, trying to find the cause of the hit. It was then that a pot that was on the edge of the cart 'teetered off' of it, falling directly on the man's head. He cried out in surprise before tripping over the trap rock, falling flat on his back. The pot shattered and revealed that the man was knocked out by the attack.

"What happened?!"

"Looks like Rudy here was doing rounds and got unfortunate."

"Tch, he won't be waking up any time soon. Be more attentive, and don't end up like this bloke."

"Aye, sir."

The leader sauntered off, leaving the 3 remaining bandits behind. Anser then moved closer and not-so stealthily nabbed the wallet of the closet guard to him. The guard felt his wallet leave his pocket and looked around, only to find it right by the hand of the one standing by the fire.

"Hey, what'ya tryna pull 'ere?!"

"Huh?"

"Don' play dumb with me, Grit!"

"What're ya- Oh. OH!" Grit gave a toothy grin as he taunted his fellow bandit. "I got yer wallet! What'cha gonna do about it?!"

"THIS!" The man tackled the other down, making them rough and tumble until they rumbled off to the side, where they landed in a ditch. The moment they got back up, some rocks just 'managed' to give way, clocking out both men in the ditch. The last remaining guard groaned in frustration upon seeing the two men lying down in the pit.

"Idiots…" He returned to his position of watching Louise. He looked down for a second, but when he looked back up, Louise was gone; the ropes had been severed. "Crap… BOSS!"

"What?!"

"Two things: One, Grit and Bangtooth managed to roughhouse themselves into a ditch and lost consciousness and Two, the girlie's gone!"

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" He growled in frustration before brandishing a battle axe. "Find whoever took her and kill em. Bring the girl back in one piece."

"Aye." The man picked up the closest weapon to him and ventured out. He eventually spotted a familiar head of pink. "There ye are… Don't worry, I'm jus' here ta take ya back…"

"HONK!"

"GAH!" The man whirled around and smacked the noise with his weapon… a pool noodle. "W-Wha-"

"Hjönk!" Without warning, the irate goose he smacked retaliated, hitting him square in the jaw with a scabbard of a sword. The moment he went down, the assault was unrelenting as more blows wailed on his defenseless body. From here, the bandit lazily opened one eye and regretted it immediately. It revealed a pure white goose illuminated by the moonlight unsheathing a broadsword, its eyes filled with malice. The man's eyes went wide with terror before rolling in the back of his skull, mentally defeated.

"And now, it's just big bad now. Come on, he can't have gotten far."

"Hjönk." Anser spared a look in Louise's hidden form in the bush before leaving, knowing she'd be alright as he confronted her kidnapper.

* * *

The bandit leader was searching high and low for either the pinkette or whoever saved her. The bushes rustled as he held his axe, ready to swing it at whatever came out. Until a plain white goose waddled out of it. The bandit leader sighed as he lowered his axe and head.

"These nerves are getting to me. I really thought this goose was the rescuer…" It was then that the goose jumped up and grabbed his helmet by its horns, yanking it off his head. "What the- get back here with that!" The burly man stowed away his axe as he chased after the goose, who was leading him deeper into the woods. The man eventually lost track of the goose as he eventually made his way into a clearing.

"My, my… You really are stupid, eh?"

"What in the- show yourself so I can spill your blood!"

"HONK!"

"GAHAH!" The bandit leader fell over as the goose from before blindsided him, causing him to fall over. The man turned over and saw the goose charging at him with a rusty blade, eyes filled with killing intent. "I refuse to lose! Especially not to some lowly goose and his rusty toothpick!"

"You'll be regretting those words very soon!" The sword cried out, stunning the barbarian just enough for the goose to throw a horned helmet it hid from under its wing at the man's head, sending him tumbling down again.

"Oof!" The goose was then on top of him, blade ready to cut him down. The barbarian hastily grabbed his axe and blocked the attack. He used his weight to get back up on his feet but was surprised by the struggle a mere goose was giving him. The weapons eventually bounced off each other, with the sword laughing giddily.

"I haven't fought like this in AGES! I feel amazing!"

"T-That sword is speaking!"

"Dang straight! And I'll be beating you soon enough!"

"Hjönk!"

"And my partner here isn't too happy that you kidnapped his master!"

"W-what?! Then you're…"

"A witch's familiar? He is, yeah. And a really pissed off one. Better start praying bucko!"

With the expertise of a trained mercenary, Anser leapt off the ground and brandished his blade appropriately as he took flight. The mere sight of such a battle-ready goose glowering down at him from above made the bandit fear death for the first time in his life. Anser then dove straight down, the bandit leader accepting his fate. But what he did not expect was the rusty sword penetrating somewhere far, FAR more precious than any of his vitals.

"UUUUWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" He roared in terrible agony. Anser pulled out the blade and sheathed it. The blade shuddered as the man howled in pain in the clearing, tears pouring from his face.

"Ouch partner. I know he kidnapped your master but still. His balls? That's a little… low." Derf laughed at his own joke while Anser waddled back towards his unconscious master. As he dragged her back towards the carriage to bring them home, he mentally checked off the last three remaining tasks he had to do while in town.

_Get someone's head trapped in a pot. -Done!_

_Knock out two people simultaneously. -Done!_

_Attack someone's crown jewels. -Done!_

The servant looked concerned as Louise was held by her familiar who had a sword slung over his back. But with one honk, the poor servant helped Louise into the cart and rode off. Eventually, Louise woke up to a series of honking and someone else talking. She groggily opened her eyes to find her goose talking to… a sword?

"And then I told him, 'I bet you couldn't scare jack.'"

"Hjönk!" Anser looked over and honked cheerfully upon seeing Louise awake.

"H-hey Anser. I'm sorry for worrying you like that. But how did I-"

"We bailed you out, Pinkie."

"What…?"

"Name's Derflinger, Derf for short. Anser here found me in an incompetent salesman's shop and took me in. Been his partner ever since."

"But that doesn't explain why you're talking!"

"Oh, well that's easy. I'm a magical weapon. Dunno what my properties are but if I'm talking I must be enchanted!"

"Uhh… huh…"

"Well, today's been one big affair for you Pinkie, so how's about you call it for the night when we get home, capiche?"

"Ca…piche?"

"Good. Now then, time to find someone to scrub me good…"

"Hjönk?"

"No, I am not letting you clean me! I've seen how you handled the other swords; I am NOT letting you handle me like those guys!"

"Honk honk!"

"You know how to wield me, not clean me! Two different things! Look, we'll find a maid or something clean me, end of story."

"Honk..."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"

Louise couldn't help but sigh. But internally she wanted to laugh. It seems that with Derf in her life, it'll only get stranger from here. Oh well, at least he and Anser are good company.

**There we are, yet another chapter done! I decided to show how much the familiar runes truly affect the familiar if they're not a human. For all his intelligence, Anser is still just a goose. And being a goose means he can't as easily shake off the influence of the runes. I guess that's a downside, but these are the Gandalfr runes we're talking about, they're inherently busted. Anser should have nothing to worry about. Also, he planned his whole list on the way into the town, I just wanted to show them being completed instead of writing the huge list beforehand. By the way, you enjoyed the little Aqua Teen Hunger Force reference I placed in here?**

**Thank you everyone who's been following, favoriting, and reviewing. It means a lot to me, and I'll try to update as frequently as I can. Until next time, see ya!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry about the late updates, things are really bad nowadays huh? Stay safe you guys, I know I am. Or I'm trying to anyways. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 5**

"Hjönk?"

"Yeah I'm with you Pard, what's a Familiar Showcase?"

"Grr… If you let me explain I'll tell you!" This was the current situation in Louise's room at the moment. She and Derflinger were constantly arguing about something while Anser was simply waiting for an explanation. Eventually, she calmed down and explained in detail what the Showcase entailed.

"So that's all fine and dandy but… he's a goose, Pinkie."

"Shut it! He was able to not only allow me to actually cast a spell for once but saved my life!"

"I helped!"

"I said shut it! I'm confident that Anser will come up with a plan for us, won't you?" The mage asked, looking towards her familiar.

"Honk."

"See! Full confidence!"

"That was an 'I'll see' honk, not an affirmative honk."

"I'LL DROWN YOU IN A VAT OF ACID YOU NO-GOOD PILE OF SCRAP METAL!"

"Hjönk!"

"I-eh?" Anser had started tugging at Louise's skirt, getting her attention. "What is it, Anser?" He then picked up Derf, causing the runes on his wing to light up softly.

"Wa-hey! What're you planning, Pard?" Anser then started some rather elaborate sword tricks, impressing his master. After he was done, she started clapping wistfully. Derf however…

"_Bleeehhh…"_

"How are you nauseous, Derf? Aren't you just a sword?"

"A sentient sword. _Sentient._ As in, I feel things too! And oh boy my shaft is hurting like crazy…" Anser made a noise that sounded like a silent snicker, much to his ire. "Shut up! As much as I like them, it is NOT an innuendo!"

"A-You know what, nevermind. I'm confident that Anser will pull through for the showcase. He's proven capable in the past, I'm sure he can show the judges how impressive he is. Especially…"

"Honk?"

"Speak up Pinkie. You trailed off there."

"The Princess! She's showing up as well!"

"Oh, well that's not pressuring at all…"

"Oh hush up! I know you two will do fine. Just don't make any noises during the showcase and you'll be good to go, Derf."

"No promises." The girl and the sword bickered for a bit longer before heading off into bed. It would've been a simple night before the big day, but Anser wanted to mess around a bit more. So when she and Derf were both asleep, he quietly made his way out of the room. Or he would've had a hooded figure not been behind the door when he opened it. The two of them looked at each other for a second before Anser took initiative.

"Honk?"

"Er… hello? I wish to see Louise Valliere if she's here." Anser instinctively fell into a defensive stance, to which the hooded figure raised up her hands frantically. "W-Wait! I'm not here to hurt her or anything! She's actually a good friend of mine, I'd call her my best friend. Honest!" Anser looked doubtful of the hooded person's claims yet he reluctantly let her in the room. And while she wasn't looking, he carefully picked up Derf, who silenced himself almost instantly.

Louise was shaken awake, much to her ire. "Mmm… Anser, not now…"

"Louise, please wake up."

"Hnng… huh?" Louise sat up and was met with a hooded figure standing over her. "A-a-assass-"

"W-What?! Nonono!" The person immediately took off their hood, revealing a purple head of hair and a girlish face. "It's me, Louise! Henrietta!"

"M-m-my liege! I am SO sorry! I labeled you as an assassin without knowing. I hope you can forgive me."

"Of course, it was my fault for scaring you. Now then, let's talk. I haven't seen you in ages!" The two girls eventually gaffed the night away, relieving Anser. He had eventually put down Derf, glad to know this Henrietta person wasn't a threat. The goose's weariness eventually got the better of him and he went to sleep, the soothing noise of his master and her friend's conversation sending him into a comforting slumber.

* * *

The day of the Showcase was upon them and the trio had spent the day mulling over what to do. Louise's concentration was surprisingly still, as not even Kirche could break her from her reverie of practice. Eventually, the day grew to dusk as the Familiar Showcase began. Many students participated, and as expected, most of them were very lackluster. The only exceptions to this would be Kirche and Tabitha with their extraordinary familiars.

"This is it, eh Pinkie?" Derf said on Anser's back. Louise only gulped in response as she waited for her turn onto the stage. Currently, Tabitha was performing with Sylphid. The performance was spectacular and would be incredibly difficult to follow-up on. Louise's legs were shaking as she gulped again. "You sure you'll be fine?"

"O-Of course… not!" Louise groaned out. "Honestly, I'm extremely nervous about this whole thing. What if I mess up? What if something goes wrong? What if-"

"Honk!"

"Eep!" Louise jumped at her familiar's sudden outburst. She was about to reprimand him until she caught onto what he wanted. "…Thank you, Anser. I guess I needed that, huh?"

"Oh yeah, definitely." The sound of the dragon and its master descending back onto the stage gave the signal that Louise was up next. "Go get 'em, Pinkie. We'll be with you all the way." Louise nodded as she walked by Tabitha, who merely gave her a small nod in return. Louise and Anser made their way onto the stage with Colbert announcing her entrance.

"My name is Louise Valliere, and this is my familiar Anser!"

"Honk!"

Some of the crowd were snickering at the goose flaunting itself before them, but Louise let out a small sigh of relief that it wasn't jeering against her for once. She let out an exhale before pointing her wand at her familiar.

"Now then, my familiar is here to perform a very specific set of skills. Skills that would make even skilled warriors tremble… maybe!" This got the crowd laughing.

"Really Zero? No confidence in your own familiar?"

"Let's see this so-called skill then!"

"What can a goose even do?"

"Grr… we'll show you! Anser!"

"Hjönk!" Anser unsheathed Derf and held him in his beak before… grabbing two more swords?! "Hjönk…" He somehow held them both in his wings and crossed them over his body and went into a hunched posed. The crowd and judges watched with bated breath as the waterfowl gave off a menacing aura along with his swords. Louise took this as her cue and grabbed a leftover prop from another performance and tossed it into the air.

"Now Anser!"

**"Hjönk Hjönk!"**

**{ONI GIRI!}**

"_Hjönk hjönk honk…"_

"_Copyright? What are you talking about?"_

"_Honk."_

"_Whaddya mean 'Don't worry about it'?! I'm worrying!"_

The crowd watched in awe as the melon prop was split in three ways as Anser descended gracefully, the two random bronze blades crumbling away as he did. Louise stood in stunned silence at what she saw and Colbert adjusted his glasses to observe Anser closely. The proof was all there for him, but he just couldn't believe it. The Goose really is the Gandalfr. May Founder have mercy on this world…

The crowd erupted in cheers at the incredulous display from a seemingly ordinary goose, which brought a bright smile to Louise's face. Unfortunately, her celebration would be cut short as a giant crash reverberated throughout the courtyard.

"W-what?!"

"DEAR FOUNDER WHAT IS HAPPENING OVER THERE?!" A judge cried out, pointing over to the walls of the Academy. And to everyone's horror, a giant golem of stone was punching the wall to the Vault. "I-Is… IS THAT A STONE GOLEM?!"

Pure panic enveloped the crowd as they ran for safety. The ones who ran to action were Tabitha, Kirche, and Louise, wands at the ready. The stone golem was mercilessly smashing its great fists against the walls with reckless abandon. Tabitha and Kirche got onto Sylphid and started pelting the behemoth with spells. All it did was annoy the giant as it attempted to swat them out of the sky.

"Tch, we're getting nowhere… huh?!"

"What is it?"

"Down there… oh Founder, Louise what're you doing!?"

Sure enough, Louise and her familiar were facing down the stone giant, which didn't even take notice of her. She snarled before pointing her wand directly at its chest.

"FIREBALL!" A centralized explosion burst through the air as it collided with the Earth Golem, causing it to stagger backward a bit. Louise cried out in shock before getting snatched up by Sylphid to avoid getting squashed. "What in the- Tabitha? Zerbst?! What are you two doing here?"

"We could ask you the same thing Louise! What were you thinking, attacking the golem on your lonesome? If we couldn't even damage that thing what makes you think-"

"Damaged."

"Huh?" Tabitha pointed at the stationary Earth Golem, hovering a hand over its side. A huge chunk of its body was eviscerated by Louise's blast. "Well, I'll be damned. That's… very impressive, Zero."

"Watch it, Zerbst. Before I sic… wait, where is he!?"

"Louise…?" Kirche looked worried as Louise started panicking in Sylphid's grasp, desperately trying to get out. "Calm down, what's going on?"

"Anser! I can't find him! We have to go get him!"

* * *

The explosion by his master caused the golem to stagger back from its injury but it also blasted a good-sized hole in the Academy's wall. Which revealed the Academy's prized vault. Well, that's one way to get in, eh? With a small waddle and a hop, Anser successfully infiltrated the Vault.

_Find a way into the Academy Vault. -Done!_

Now then, where to start…? Well, there was the Staff, the Thief who most likely got in, and ooh shiny!

"What the- are you just picking up everything that looks valuable Pard?"

"Hjönk."

"I don't- what?" If he could, Derf would've shaken his head at his Partner's antics. Just when he thought he'd seen everything, Anser found an enchanted pouch that when he poked his head in it, he ended up taking out a 'pool noodle' as he called it. According to the goose, it looked like the pouch was linked to his hoard he was building up somehow. The goose shrugged it off as weird magic stuff and slung it onto his wing. Derf watched in amazement as his partner took anything that seemed useful and stashed it in his portable treasure chest.

"Honk Honk!" Anser suddenly got excited as he grabbed two strange boxes labeled as the 'Receiver Dials', whatever that meant.

"What's so special about these things?"

"Hjönk honk honk."

"…Walkie… Talkies? That's a really lame name."

"Hjönk?"

"I probably could! Give me… I dunno, 30-40 years and I'll get a better name! Like… Den Den Mushi!"

"Honk."

"You gotta be kidding me! How is that Copyrighted?!"

"Hjönk?"

"No I haven't heard of 'One Piece', shut up." The duo's banter was cut short when they reached the greatest treasure of the Vault: The Staff of Destruction. It was an odd-looking thing, specifically, it looked nothing like a staff. In fact, it was much too big to be called a Staff. Massive, Thick, Heavy, and Far too Rough. Indeed, it was like a heap of raw iron. But it was a Staff none-

"Honk."

"H-Hey… I was monologuing there!"

"Honk hjönk!"

"Wait, you mean you've seen this thing before?!"

"Honk…"

_As he ran through the village in his goosey fashion, the Goose stumbled into an old man's home. Curious, he explored it. If for anything, to ransack the poor sod's abode. He ran amok everywhere, trampling curtains and sheets alike. But when he reached the living room, he saw a peculiar thing hanging up on the wall. It was a weapon dubbed 'Old Reliable' by the placard underneath it. And underneath that, in fine print, read 'M72 LAW MDL 1963'. The Goose was intrigued by this thing and wondered if he should take it for himself._

_He then stared at the photo next to it, which showed two men in a black and white picture, both of them holding their own rocket launchers. And the message on it read "1969… MISS YA RICKY"… Well that's not depressing. Who cares though, free Rocket Launcher! Or it would've had the old man not gotten up and chased the Goose out of the house with a really threatening broom. He crashed outside and was met with all his stuff being thrown out with him. Well at least the guy was kind enough to do that!_

"Founder, that's quite the story… I can't believe we even had the time to sit through that flashback." Derf commented. "Well then, what should we do?"

"Hon-"

"There it is! Only took me so long…" A feminine voice rang out. From the shadows emerged a hooded figure who sauntered over to the M72. "I've been searching for this thing for SO long…"

"Honk?"

"Hm? A goose? Did you wander in here accidentally little guy?" The hooded woman squatted down to level with the goose. "Wait a second… you're the familiar of that pink-haired girl, aren't you? With that silly get-up and all?"

"H…jönk?"

"Eh, no matter. What can a goose do to me anyways. Look, I'll just be taking this and be on my way, okay? Don't make this hard for me." Anser stayed silent as the thief grabbed the staff. As she was about to leave, he lunged at her. "GAH?! WHAT THE?!"

"HONK HONK!" A flurry of beak, feather, and webbed feet flew into the thief's face, making her stumble over and dropping the staff. She growled, but before Anser could move to grab it, she waved her wand and sent a small earth tsunami to move it away from the goose and into her Golem's lowered hand. "Honk?"

"Yeah, how'd you like that? Get off!" The hooded woman grabbed Anser by his neck and flung him off, where he barely caught himself and softened his landing with goosey gracefulness. "Nice acrobatics, but I've got to get going. It's been fun but… ah who am I kidding, up yours, Goose!" The woman stuck her tongue out before hopping into her golem's hand, leaving an irritated Anser behind.

Oh, he did not like this one bit. Let's go over what he did... drat, not a dang thing! Well… that's not necessarily true.

_Steal some treasures -Done!_

But he let her get away, that was all him. Darn his gooseyness, if he didn't get grabbed by his neck he would've saved the Staff. But next time they meet, Anser will have his revenge, and oh boy will it be sweet. He waddled out the Vault room where he found a teary-eyed Louise waiting for him. She ran up and hugged him, grateful he was still alive. But unbeknownst to her, Anser was now plotting a very, very dastardly scheme.

_Absolutely HUMILIATE that Thief!_

**And finished! Hopefully, this is a good chapter for you guys. I am currently writing this late at night with nothing else to do so… that's my life at the moment. Also, wow, 227 follows and 195 favs, I didn't think this would get that much attention! Thank you guys, and I feel bad for delaying this for a while. I just sorta got stuck on how I wanted to approach this chapter, then I got caught up with work. But with this whole Covid thing, I can work more on my stories now. Speaking of, please wash your hands and remember to stay safe out there! Until next time!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello everyone! Sorry for the late update! I got a new laptop and I just got around to buy myself Office again. So, I should try to get these out a bit faster. Hopefully. Anyways, sit back and enjoy! And remember: Wash your hands!**

**Chapter 6**

"Brimir's sake… what do we do? What do we do? What do we do? Founder, what do we do?" Derf mumbled. "What do we do?"

"Silence! Just… let me think okay?!" Louise cried. She was just all sorts of stressed right now. First, Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt infiltrated the Academy's Vault, then she stole the Staff of Destruction among other treasures, and now her familiar has been acting strange ever since she found him in the vault. Anser has just been brooding these past few days and has had an unnaturally horrible glint in his eyes. She's been worried for him since. "Look, Headmaster Osmond will figure something out. We have the best mages from all over Tristain here to help us capture Fouquet!"

"…" Anser silently brooded as Derf and Louise were wondering what to do. His internal musings were cut short by a knock on the door. Louise opened it and was greeted by Siesta.

"Erm, I hope I'm not interrupting anything, but the Headmaster wishes to see you two."

"Us? What for?"

"I don't know the specifics milady, but I assume it was because your familiar was with the thief when she stole the Staff."

"I see. Thank you, maid, we'll be heading there promptly." Louise went to sling Derf over her shoulder when she got a quizzical look from Siesta. "Is something the matter?"

"No! Er, well… I just never seen the students here hold weaponry is all."

"I see. Well…" Louise didn't know how to properly respond. Siesta was right, nobles don't carry weapons as their wands are their only tool. But she couldn't really say that it was her familiar's own, despite his impressive showing at the showcase. And she really didn't want to be rude to the maid, she was just asking a question. Louise sighed, but luckily, Siesta saved her from answering.

"Oh, you don't need to answer, milady! I let my curiosity get the better of me. I won't let it happen again!"

"Y-you don't need to do that…"

"Eheh… oh! We're here!" Siesta opened the door for Louise and Anser before bowing out. Louise gave her a slight nod before staring at the Headmaster's room. She took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Ah, Miss Valliere, thank you for joining us. Please, take a seat." Osmond gestured towards an empty seat… next to Kirche and Tabitha.

"W-What?! What are they doing here?!" She exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger towards the Germanian. Said girl was playfully offended as she sent a wry grin to the pinkette.

"Oh, come now Louise, we're all friends here, aren't we?"

"In your dreams!"

"Ahem!" Osmond cleared his throat before the two girls could continue their bout. Louise grumbled before taking a seat next to her rival, her loyal goose following behind. "Now then, you three must be wondering why I called you along with our staff." Before he could continue, however, Tabitha spoke up.

"We're the strongest in the school."

"I-er… yes. You and Miss Zerbst have extraordinary magical prowess, with Miss Zerbst being a Triangle Class Mage and you yourself Miss Tabitha as a Chevalier. As for Miss Valliere, your, er… your familiar is incredible, to say the least, being able to wield certain artifacts from our Vault with ease." Louise groused at the last bit, but at least Anser was praised. Said goose was busy preening himself. "And as such, we would like to ask you to conduct an investigation on the Vault Thief, Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt."

"With all due respect Headmaster, why us?" Louise asked. "Why can't our teachers go?"

"Because they're cowards, aren't they?" All but Colbert shrunk under Kirche's glare. The bald professor matched her glare with a stare that hid his true emotions.

"I would not fault you for thinking so, Miss Zerbst. However, we must stay here in case any other would-be robbers threaten our vault once more."

"Hmph." And just like that, the air in the office had grown tense. Osmond rubbed his temples, wondering what to do when Louise spoke up.

"Fine, we'll do it." Tabitha and Kirche looked at her with surprise. "I'm tired of being called worthless, so let me do something worthwhile and prove everyone here wrong. I know what happened that night. I was able to make a dent in that behemoth with my explosions. I won't let Fouquet get away this time, and I will retrieve the staff."

"Heheh… such brave words from Little Louise~"

"Why you-"

"Fine, I shall accompany you as well. I can't let you get hurt, can I?"

"Tch."

"I'm coming too." Louise's gaze softened a bit when Tabitha jumped in.

"That's fine with me. I'll appreciate the help. But just know that it'll be my familiar and I taking down Fouquet!"

"Then it's settled. Girls, first thing tomorrow, you three and Miss Longueville here will track down Fouquet. She had already mapped out her possible whereabouts." Osmond nodded to his secretary, who nodded in return. "You are dismissed."

* * *

"Wand?"

"Check."

"Anser?"

"Honk."

"Derf?"

"Present."

Louise adjusted her bag and smiled. She was actually going on a proper mission for once! The chance to prove she wasn't worthless was just too good to pass up! Petting Anser on his goosey head, she slung Derf over her shoulder and headed out to the academy's stables. When she arrived, she was met with her 'teammates' for this adventure. She groaned at having to work with them, but she had no other choice.

"Well, look who decided to finally show up." Kirche giggled.

"Zip it, cow." Louise's anger was cut short by confusion. "Wait, where's Miss Longueville?"

"No idea. We were the first ones here. I assume she's still gathering up resources for our quest."

"I see. Looks like we'll be waiting around a bit more, huh?" While Louise and Kirche began bickering once more, the trio of familiars met back up after what felt like ages for them.

"Hjönk Hjönk Honk!"

"Kyuu Kyu, Kyuuun!"

"Ssaah Sah Sah!"

The three friends gleefully recounted their days to each other. However, it wasn't long before they took notice of their feathered friend's abnormal behavior. A little questioning let them know what exactly he had in store for the thief that made a fool of him, and both of the familiars felt immense pity for the poor thief. Eventually, Miss Longueville arrived with an armful of maps and a stable boy to man the stagecoach. Apparently, this was easier to travel on as Tabitha's Dragon would cause a disturbance and allow Fouquet to escape.

On the road, Miss Longueville discussed with the teens where she singled out Fouquet's location. And although the girls took it at face value, some others weren't as convinced.

"Psst, pard." Derf whispered to Anser.

"honk." The waterfowl 'whispered' back.

"Ain't it a bit weird how she knows _this_ much about our thief?"

"…"

"You don't think… no, I'm probably jumping to conclusions here…"

"Hjönk."

"Ah, so you had the same thought process as I did, huh? Well, we'll see if we're right soon enough."

As if on cue, Miss Longueville left the team to go somewhere, she didn't specify. The three girls and their familiars ventured into the forest where they heard a scream. They stumbled upon an unassuming shack, an obvious trap. Tabitha remained wary as Louise and Kirche decided to venture inside. And inside was none other than the Staff of Destruction, just lying there.

"There it is! That was easy enough. Now, let's grab this and head back."

"I'm sorry, you meant to grab it and return it to _me_." A feminine voice called out from behind them. A hooded figure pointed their wand at Louise and Kirche before dropping it, revealing Miss Longueville. "Let's not fight, shall we girls?"

"Miss Longueville?! You're Fouquet?!"

"Of course. I was waiting for ages to grab that stupid Staff. But I had to garner the trust of the Headmaster and the Faculty. And it seems to have worked. Now then, _give me the Staff_." Her voice becoming threatening. Louise and Kirche tensed up, prepared to fight. Fouquet sighed and shook her head. "As expected from some noble brats. GOLEM!"

A massive beast of earth and clay arose from the ground beneath the woman as it broke the shack and towered over the three mages. Tabitha took the initiative and whistled for Sylphid. The blue dragon sped towards her master and took off, Tabitha launching Ice Spells at her opponent with impressive speed. The golem merely shrugged off the blows while attempting to swat down the Dragon Rider like a fly. Kirche growled before launching a flurry of Fire spells at Fouquet, who shielded herself with a Rock Barrier.

"Is that all you got?! Pitiful!"

"FIREBALL!" An explosion ripped through the air, bursting apart the Golem's leg, forcing it to fall. "How'd you like that?!"

"You dang brat…!" With a mighty slam of its fist, The Golem sent a massive shockwave onto the ground forcing Louise and Kirche to succumb to the tremors. Tabitha flew down to try and assist them but was soon blasted by a boulder.

"Tabitha!" Louise and Kirche yelled for their fallen friend. She weakly got up and prepared herself. Louise then got up and deflected another rock blast aimed at Tabitha with Derf. The vibrating metal along with no formal training from using a blade made the pinkette drop the sword. "Tch, sorry Derf...!"

"Don't worry about me, she's your enemy!" The blade harshly whispered back.

"Kehahaha! Look at you three, squirming like grubs! I should finish this the right way… with the Staff of Destruction!" Fouquet reached for the Staff… only to find out it was missing. "Eh?"

"Hjönk!"

The voice of their savior would be none other than a Horrible Goose. A Goose who was more than through with this terrible thief. He pulled out the Staff of Destruction, no, the M72 LAW MDL 1963, from his wings. An absolutely horrible glint was in his goosey eyes as he somehow pointed it at Fouquet.

"Keheheh… nice goosey… y-you can't possibly know how that thing works, do you? I couldn't even figure it out, and I'm a-"

_CLINK_

_KA-CHUNK_

Anser had not only removed the safety lock from the Rocket Launcher, but he also loaded it with malicious intent.

"Oh, crap."

"Hjönk Honk."

_**FWOOOOOOSSSHHHHHHHH!**_

The harsh sound made by the terrifying weapon of war was accompanied by the sound of the thunder itself crashing into Fouquet's Golem and her makeshift barrier, which it ate right through. The explosion sent the thief flying into the ruins of the shack, her golem falling apart as she did. She fell into the heap bruised, beaten, but alive and conscious. Perfect.

Anser waddled nonchalantly towards his opponent, who fear every step his webbed feet took. Fouquet reached for her wand, only to find out it was blasted to smithereens in the explosion. Every second that Anser got closer, Fouquet's fear of death grew exponentially. Then, after an eternity, the goose got up to her face, his feet planted on her chest. Fouquet was hyperventilating, absolutely terrified by what this… this… _monster _would do to her. He looked her dead in her eyes before reaching into his satchel and pulled out… a small yellow box.

"What in the…"

"Hjönk!"

"_**Hjönk!"**_ An echo of the sound came from behind her. The shock of the sound, along with her already heightened fear, did it for her. Tears streamed down the poor thief's face as her mouth foamed. Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt had been defeated miserably.

_Capture the thief. -Done!_

_Absolutely HUMILIATE that Thief! -Done!_

"F-Founder above… what just happened?" Kirche managed to croak out.

"My familiar… is… rather horrible… isn't he?"

* * *

"Now, normally, I'd reprimand you for taking Vault treasures, however…" Osmond sighed as he looked back at their savior. Louise's Goose, who was proudly flaunting himself. "You can keep whatever you took. I'll just… turn a blind eye to this. If they saved you and your mistress from that thief, then they'd be better in your hands. Or wings rather."

"Honk!"

"H-Honk indeed… Now then, I believe you and your mistress are incredibly tired from today, as am I. You two, er… you two take care of yourselves." And with that. Anser was escorted out of the Headmaster's office by Siesta. Said maid had stars in her eyes as she regarded the goose next to her.

"I can't believe you did something like that! That's nothing short of incredible! Especially for someone of your stature, Mister Anser!"

"Honk Hjönk Hjönk!"

"Hehehe, well I'm glad you're enjoying yourself Anser. I'm sure Miss Louise is happy with herself too. I heard she was the only other person to hurt that golem. Is that true?"

"Honk!" Anser replied proudly. Despite everything, if Louise hadn't weakened that Golem, he wouldn't have gotten his chance at revenge. He couldn't be prouder to be a familiar of his master. Besides, if she is a Zero, how did she manage to do something as cool as that?

"What a nice familiar you are." Siesta sighed as she sat down on some steps. "I wish I was born with magic sometimes; you know? Oh, don't tell anyone I told you that! I could get in big trouble if you did!"

"Honk." Anser jumped into the maid's lap as he let her ramble on about her troubles. It seemed like his presence put her at ease as if he was some sort of emotional support animal. Weird. Once Siesta was done, she continued walking Anser back to his room. That was until they bumped into a rather important-looking man, however.

"Watch where you're stepping, trash!"

"I-I'm sorry milord! It won't happen again!"

"Hmm…" The man's gaze turned lecherous for a bit as he eyed up Siesta. "I wonder… nevermind, leave me for now, maid." Siesta watched him leave before sighing in relief.

"Whew, I was sure I was a goner there. I wonder who that was?"

"Count Mott, the Royal Messenger," Louise said, startling Siesta.

"Kyaa! I'm sorry milady, I was supposed to bring Anser back to your room and then I got sidetracked and then I-" Louise held up a hand and smiled.

"That's enough, Siesta. I overheard you gushing to my familiar earlier, y'know?"

"Y-you did?! Omigosh, I'm so embarrassed. Please, please don't tell anyone milady!"

"Of course not. You'd lose your income for your family if I did, isn't that right?"

"I-yes!"

"Heh. You know, I'm glad." Louise's gaze softened a bit as she looked outside. Siesta stared at the noble as she continued. "I thought that everyone in this school was out to get me. From the students to the teachers, and even the commoners. I guess I was right for the most part. But… hearing you talk so highly of me, even though I've caused everyone here nothing but trouble… It felt nice for once." Louise's eyes grew misty before she wiped them. 'No, Rule of Steel Louise…'

"I… I don't know what to say, milady. T-thank you!"

"I should be telling you that. And please Siesta, call me Louise. I don't care if you're a commoner or not… from now on, you are my friend." With a bright smile, Siesta cried tears of joy. Anser watched the exchange happily, yet something was bugging him. Why was that weird Mott guy eyeing Siesta like that? And what exactly is he here for? Questions for later he supposed. One thing is for sure, Louise never looked happier, and he couldn't help but feel glad for her and her newfound friend.

**Another chapter done! I always like the fics where Louise and Siesta becomes friends, so the Mott Encounter is more direct for Louise than in canon. I do plan on something fun for that fight, but that won't be anytime soon! I appreciate all the support you guys have been giving me for this story and I apologize for making you guys wait so long for a new chapter. In other news, my birthday was a few days ago, turned 19 and had a blast. Hopefully I get more motivation to get out a new chapter soon. Anyways, that's it for me. Take care of yourselves and stay safe!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Oh yeah, goose time baybee.**

**Chapter 7**

After the events of the forest clearing, life returned to relative normalcy for the small mage and her familiar. Anser's hoard has grown quite a bit and he felt proud of himself for it. His magic satchel, unfortunately, couldn't instantly transport anything new to his spot, but he preferred doing things the old-fashioned way anyways. As for Louise, she had begun to enjoy herself with her new friend in Siesta. Some other nobles decided to heckle the poor maid, but Louise's volatile nature towards them scared them off. Right now, the two of them were on the outskirts of the academy. Louise was trying her hand at more magic practice with Siesta assisting however she can.

"Just watch! I'll be able to recreate what happened in the classroom all those days ago! I just need to…" She aimed her wand at the boulder in front of them, concentrating on what she wanted. "Steady… Steady… FIREBALL!"

**BOOM!**

"GAH! Brimir's Sake!" She swore. Siesta laughed lightly as Louise set of another explosion. The pinkette glared at her, but at this point, Siesta was comfortable enough around the small noble that she easily recognized a playful glare from a real one. And this one was still good-natured.

"I'm sorry Louise, but look at it this way: You made a sizable dent in the boulder!" She gestured towards the hunk of stone, which was missing a decent-sized chunk on its face. The results of multiple explosions can do that. "You can do it; I believe in you!"

"Ugh, what's the point? I just keep failing at casting a single spell…"

"That's not true, Pinky!" Derf finally spoke up from his scabbard. Siesta would've been startled had she not become acquainted with the enchanted sword days before. She found him quite the listener whenever she needed to vent. It felt nice, really. "if you failed to cast something, it'd just fizzle out. But you don't fizzle out, you explode!"

"That's even worse!"

"Let me finish!" the sword chided. "You exploding means that there's magic involved, but how though, is the question. What element corresponds with explosions?"

"Fire…? No, that never works in general. Plus, it's not igniting from anything so… hmm…"

"Then it might be Voi-" Siesta's voice was immediately silenced by Louise's hand, who looked pale. After an unspoken agreement, she let go of her hand. "Oh Founder, I almost got us all killed for blasphemy…" Siesta also went as white as a sheet. Derf simply sighed.

"It's a valid theory, I will say that. But is it one the Church will accept? I hate these new times… Brimir, why'd you have to such a stingy prick with your magic…?" He muttered the last part to himself.

"Did you say something Derf?"

"Nothing. By the way, have you seen Pard lately?"

"Anser? Now that you mention it… no, not really. I wonder where he went?" Louise's question would soon be answered by a hateful cry.

"_**PHEASANT'S BEAK!"**_

"…oh."

* * *

Anser was having the time of his life. He hasn't been causing mischief in AGES, and that takes a toll on an avian. Luckily, he found the perfect breeding ground of Chaos in the courtyard. Guiche spotted him and immediately went defensive. The poor boy made every attempt to maintain a low profile against the waterfowl. It seems like he learned his place. Good.

Now then, where to start? Hmm, that blue-haired girl? Ehh… the fruit's hanging so low, but…

_Snatch the spellbook_

You have to start somewhere, y'know? Luckily, the Vault granted him some 'new' toys to play with. Literally. Anser thought he'd never see the likes of Walkie Talkies and Cardboard Boxes again, yet here they were. He had no idea how they got here, nor did he care. All he knew was to cause chaos. And cause chaos he shall. He'd lay low and set everything perfectly. Tabitha was no slouch, but maybe, just maybe, he can grab that book of hers.

* * *

Tabitha was having a nice morning. Kirche had decided to leave her to flirt with… honestly, she really didn't care. More time to read her tome. It was incredibly informative and filled to the brim with advanced ice techniques. Some techniques were very out there, naming and usage. Seriously, who names a spell where you freeze your opponent almost instantaneously 'Ice Time'? She didn't care though. Some of the other techniques looked strong, yet doable for her. Maybe she can try them out on her-

_Clunk_

What was that? With her honed reflexes, Tabitha stopped reading and readied her staff. It couldn't have been someone being careless with their trash, she was too far away from the rest of the ruckus. An assassin maybe? No, it'd be too risky, especially in the Academy's walls. But maybe Joseph is getting bolder? Better to be safe than sorry. She carefully closed her tome and got into a stance as she went to where the noise came from. Calm, calculative steps marched onto a spot on the ground. From there, the strangest thing Tabitha has ever seen was sitting there.

A small, blue box. But as she stared at it, it somehow gave off an eerie, menacing aura. It was as if it would lead to certain doom if she interacted with it. Gulping, she magically levitated it towards her, careful not to pick it up. Founder, why was she sweating so hard? Was it a bomb? A poison? Some sort of new weapon? What can it-

_**Hjönk!**_

"Eep!" And with that, she lost her concentration on the walkie talkie. Tabitha quickly shook off her surprise with intrigue. That sound was unmistakable; that was Louise's Goose. But why was it… oh. Oh no.

From her spot, her tome was gone. She was too frozen her in shock that she failed to notice the slowly retreating cardboard box.

"Apologize to Louise later. Freeze Goose… now."

* * *

_Snatch the spellbook -Done!_

Wow. That was like taking candy from a baby. A baby that can freeze you to death with a glare but still, a baby! Also, how did no one notice the weird box scuttling away? He was in some weird fantasy world, how are cardboard boxes STILL inconspicuous?! Well, no point in looking a gift horse in the mouth, onto the next target.

"Why should I worry about my trash? If the servants can't clean it up, then it's their fault, not mine. Besides, if it lands in the river, it'll just whisk it away somewhere else and I won't deal with it ever again." Who said that!? Which one of you snot-nosed br- patience Anser, patience. Let's see who we're- and it's Malicorn. Of course, it's Malicorn. Time to show you what happens when you mess with the river. MY River!

_Punish the Heretic_

Anser 'smiled' maliciously as Malicorn was busy arguing with Guiche, who was annoyed with him tossing trash everywhere. The foppish boy had grown disgusted with the portly boy's actions, plus he really didn't want his friend to be on the business end of the Goose's rage. Malicorn simply huffed at Guiche's chiding and sat back down, only to cry out in pain.

"AAAAHHHHH! I-I-I've been wounded! Help me, Guiche! It hurts so much!" the poor boy had tears welling up in his eyes. Guiche could only look on, bewildered at what happened.

"M-Malicorn…? H-hey, get up for a second…"

"O-okay…" He fearfully got up and saw what violated his bottom. "W-what?! Who would do such a cruel thing?!" On his seats were caltrops of varying sizes. Some were still stuck on the boy's rear end.

"Yikes… Maybe you shouldn't have insulted the river like that."

"What does that have anything to do with this?!" Realization suddenly dawned on the portly boy's face. "I've been cursed by a River Spirit!"

"What? No, it's more-"

"FORGIVE ME, O' SPIRIT OF THE RIVERS! I PROMISE I'LL NEVER LITTER AGAIN IN MY LIFE! JUST DON'T HURT ME ANYMORE!" He cried out in anguish. Guiche merely looked on, letting a sweat drop from his head.

"…Well, I guess he counts as spirit, not that Malicorn has to know…"

_Punish the Heretic -Done!_

Anser had to admit, it felt really nice to be praised as River Spirit. The actual spirit would appreciate his effort greatly. A really nice person once you get to know them by the way! Now then, what is his current objective?

_Survive._

What.

"**You."** A cold, uncaring voice called out.

Oh, that's what that meant, huh?

Crap.

"Hjönk Honk Honk!" Anser made a run for it, tome in bill. Tabitha was rushing behind him, mercilessly casting ice spells at him. If he wasn't so used to outmaneuvering people, he would've actually been hit by some of those spears. Wow, that's incredibly scary. Eventually, Anser got cornered, with an incredibly pissed Tabitha glaring at him. She pointed her wand at the Goose with murderous intent.

"Hand it over. Now." It was not a request, nor a suggestion. It was a demand. But Anser was defiant, unbelievably so. So, he stood his ground and did a makeshift plan. He can use the tome as a shield and- hey what fell out of the book?

A thin book with two boys in a suggestive pose and a big R-18 tag on the front fell from the pages of the tome. And being from Earth, Anser knew _exactly_ what this was. If he could laugh, he DEFINITELY would. Oh, she can keep her tome, there's a bigger haul right here!

"Do. Not. Give. To. Kirche."

You fool, you absolute idiot. You bumbling buffoon. That wasn't even my plan, but now? That was on you, specs.

_Give Kirche the present!_

With the quickness of a certain blue hedgehog, Anser dropped the tome and snatched up the doujin. He ran past Tabitha's legs before she could react and made a mad dash to the Courtyard. All he could hope for now is make Little Miss Quiet's day incredibly horrible. Anser used his goosey gracefulness to vault over the ledges and glide down the hills. All the while, Tabitha was massively gaining on him. Fast. But luck seemed to side with him today. Flame was having a sunbath nearby.

"Honk Hjönk!"

"Ssah Saah- SSAAAHH!?"

"Hjönk Hjönk Hjönk!"

"S-Ssaahh SSaassh Ssahh Saah!"

"Honk Honk!"

Thank GOD for his friend! With practiced finesse, he made a sharp U-Turn, making the bluenette stumble a bit as he went down the alley that Kirche was supposed to be. And lo' and behold, the Ardent Mage herself was just leaving after messing with some first-year boy.

"Hmm? Aren't you Louise's Goose? What are you doing here? Oh, maybe you're here to pledge allegiance to me than the Ze-"

_Fwap!_

"Eh?" Kirche's vision was blinded for a second before she removed the offending item off her face. She was about to reprimand the Goose when she looked at what was in her hands. Its title was simply called Boy Love Love, and from the familiar dog-ear style that she knew, Kirche's grin grew catlike. "Oh, this is just grand…"

_Give Kirche the present! -Done!_

Just in time for Anser to turn around and find a pale-faced Tabitha staring blankly at her friend, who was giggling at her expense. Anser simply waddled away. Well, he started to. Then he broke out into a full-on mad dash of self-preservation as Tabitha rounded the corner coldly.

"_**PHEASANT'S BEAK!"**_

A pheasant made of ice barreled its way towards Anser, who barely dodged out the way. Holy crap dude! WHY can she do that?! That's not fair! Anser growled goosily as he reached into his satchel, pulling out a hose. He blasted a stream of water at his assailant, who froze it instantly. Well, there goes Plan A. Plan B! Anser reached into his bag, setting the trap for her.

Tabitha caught up and planned to turn the goose into an ice pop when something heavy slammed into her staff, knocking it out of her hands. What in the- oh. Wait, what is that!?

A sledgehammer. Anser had a sledgehammer. And he was not afraid to use it, as Tabitha's discarded staff was any indicator. The other nobles and even the servants came up to find out the commotion, only to find Tabitha and Anser at a standoff. The goose had put away the sledgehammer for a strange pistol. Sure, it looked like a pistol, but much more compact. And Tabitha was forced to keep her hands in the air as the Goose somehow loaded it.

"Anser! What're you doing?!" Louise's voice rang out. However, that startled the goose and he 'accidentally' pulled the trigger.

Time came to a standstill. All the students could do was watch Tabitha take a bullet to her skull. It was so quick, no one knew what happened. She staggered back, and everyone around looked on in horror as her forehead was struck. One girl fainted and the others stood in shock. As for Tabitha…

"…What?"

A foam dart had stickied itself onto her forehead. Tabitha stared at the 'bullet' dully as she gently pulled it off. She studied the offending dart with interest. What in the world did that goose just use on her? It didn't feel like a weapon of war, nor some makeshift one. It felt like… like a toy. Was he… toying with her?

…Wow, that's pretty rude.

"Hjönk Honk… Honk Honk." Derf 'stared' dumbly at his partner before whispering to Siesta.

"What do you think he means by 'It's Nerf or Nothing?'" Siesta was equally confused.

_Survive -Done!_

* * *

After sorting out that troublesome affair at the courtyard, Louise was desperately trying to get a read on her familiar. Said familiar was busy preening himself next to her as she wearily sat down next to him. Apparently, he took Tabitha's spell book for some reason and she just wanted it back. It doesn't explain why that warranted an Albionese Standoff but if it worked out in the end, she shouldn't worry. Right? Louise sighed as she petted her familiar.

"Sometimes you worry me, you know that?"

"Hjönk?"

"Yeah, you do. But… you can do all sorts of things a normal goose just… can't. Just what are you Anser?" The goose simply cocked his head at his master. She let out another sigh as she returned to the boulder. "No point in dwelling over it now, I have a boulder to scorch."

Louise took in a deep breath as magic pooled on the tip of her wand.

'Concentrate… Concentrate…'

The glow at the tip of her wand was shrinking fast, as it normally did before it exploded.

'Can't focus on that… I just need to-'

"Hjönk!" Anser honked in her ear.

"Gah!"

_**FWOOSH!**_

A harsh ball, no, a FIST of… MAGMA!? A Fist of Magma crashed into the boulder, forcing it to melt under its molten strength. Louise stared at the molten rock in amazement.

"That wasn't a Fireball. Not in the slightest… That was… That was…"

"AMAZING!" Siesta squealed in joy. "How did you do that Louise?!"

"I… I don't know. It happened again, Anser saved the Spell and made it succeed. But it came out a lot stronger this time. I don't think anyone has actually made a Magma Ball before, much less a Magma Fist. What do I even call it?"

"How about… Daifunka?" Derf suggested.

"What does that even mean?"

"Hmm… Good question. It just felt familiar is all, like someone I knew from a long time ago used it."

"Wait, you've seen this spell before?!"

"I think so? It's been so long since I was a young blade. It must've been over 5,000 years ago…"

"But that was when the Founder was alive!" Siesta exclaimed.

"Was the Founder your first owner?!"

"I didn't say that! But… maybe someone close to him? Man, I can't remember anything properly from all those years ago…"

"It's fine Derf, I won't force you to remember. But this is news, huh?" Louise was now in deep thought. Her casting such a powerful spell that Derf somehow knew about… Her Familiar and her Blade were both extremely mysterious individuals. And a part of that mystery really worried her. But if they're with her, she should be fine… right?

**Another Chapter done! A little on the nicer side of things now that Fouquet's been dealt with. One more chapter before I head into the Mott faceoff. Really excited to pull that one off! Well then, until next time, peace out!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Finally getting around to make a new chapter. Been busy with stuff irl. Time for Goose!**

**Chapter 8**

"…So, you're trusting the two of us to go and shop, am I getting that right?" Derf asked. Louise groaned as she put down her plume.

"You're making it sound like I shouldn't be trusting you two!"

"Hjönk!"

"Look, that's not the issue, okay?!" Louise sighed as she knelt down and fastened Anser's bag onto his goosey frame. "I'm going to be practicing more on my magic control today, so I can't exactly go and do my own shopping this time around. So, I'm trusting you, my familiar, to do this task for me. Can you do it, Anser?"

"…" Said goose looked into his master's eyes before nodding. "Honk."

"Good. I have a bag of gold in there for you. Anything extra you can spend however you wish. Stay safe and come home in one piece, okay?" Louise had some concern in her voice at the end but was alleviated with the confident honk of her familiar. Anser waddled out of the room, satchel strapped to his 'person' and Derf on his back. Louise put a palm to her face as her familiar left. "You know… he does look somewhat out of place with that get-up. I-I'm probably just overthinking things…"

* * *

Anser made it to the town after getting a drop from Sylphid. He made a beeline for the essentials that Louise had him get and was impressed that there was still a sizable amount of gold left to buy things with. He wandered for a bit before stumbling upon the Weaponsmith he bought Derf from.

"What the- oh, it's just you two."

"Honk."

"Whaddya want this time, store wrecker?"

"Carl! It's been a while!" Derf exclaimed. Carl's face morphed into one of disdain as he regarded the sword once again.

"Ohhh, just my lucky day. The sword in my side is back. Great. You better not be selling him back to me you stupid duck!"

"Honk?!" Anser seemed offended by the accusation. 'Duck?!'

"Hey, hey, we're all friends here, ain't that right Carl?"

"You flap your sheath on me again and I'm puttin' you through blade testing."

"Eep!"

"Heheheh… Ah, neva gets old… So, whaddya want?"

"I was _hoping _for a polish, but now I'm not too sure."

"Ah c'mon swordie, it's not that bad! Heck, it's ya lucky day! My wife's back in town!"

"SHE IS?! TAKE HER TO ME IMMEDIATELY. I _NEED _HER HANDS!" Derf begged.

"Hey, hey, hey! What's with all the yelling?" A voice called out from behind Carl. Then the woman revealed herself, a pretty redhead with a merchant's smile. "Oh, it's just Derflinger. Back so soon huh? I thought we sold you off."

"And you did! However, er…" Derf somehow cleared his throat. "I, uh… need some polishing, please ma'am."

"Ma'am?"

"Milady, my mistake! Please, just clean me like you normally do, I beg of you!" Anser was wondering how Derf was somehow crying as a sword of all things. The woman before them merely sighed.

"Normally I would, but since you're not my sword anymore, there'll be a fee…" She put a finger to her chin as she thought up of some numbers. Anser took a look at the bag at her side, which didn't go unnoticed by the merchant couple.

"Hm? Whaddya want from ma' wife's bag, duck? There's no food in there, shoo."

"Honk." Anser pulled out Louise's coin purse and gestured towards the bag again. The redhead woman understood exactly what was happening as lights shone in her eyes.

"A customer! This is unexpected, but I'll welcome it just the same. Oh, shoot, where are my manners?" The woman put a hand to her chest while the other wrapped around Carl. "My name's Anna, the Secret Seller! And you already know my lovable bear Carl here. I sell all sorts of odds-and-ends I find. Most people think it's junk, but someone out there will have an eye for it. Is that someone you, Mister… uh, Derf, what's his name?"

"Anser."

"Alright then, Anser! I see you already looking at my wares with interest. So, let's make a deal then." Anna knelt down to the goose, who stared at her inquisitively. "I'll take care of Derf and any other maintenance you need me to do, and you buy my stock in return. Deal?" The answer was obvious for our friendly neighborhood goose as he stuck out a wing to shake Anna's hand. With that being said, Anser picked out some shiny new toys to work with as Derf got a much-needed scrubbing and polish. By the end of the trip, Derf looked like a brand-new sword.

"Ahhh~ I absolutely LOVE this, you know that Pard?" Anser only nodded as Derf rambled on about his new shiny sheen. Derf noted how intensely the goose was thinking as they waddled home. "I know that look all-too-well, partner. You're thinking of more tricks and traps, aren't you?"

"Hjönk hjönk."

"Your mind really goes into overdrive when thinking about horrible deeds. It's like you were running situations over and over in your head until you perfected them…"

"Hjönk."

"…What does 'playtesting' even mean? You know what, forget it. We're almost home anyway."

* * *

The door to Louise's bedroom opened as Anser waddled in. Louise's face lit up upon seeing her familiar back home in one piece.

"Thank Brimir you made it home! How did the shopping trip go?" Louise glanced over to the rather large bag Anser had with him. "Er… you _did_ buy the supplies I asked for, correct?"

"Hjönk!" Anser honked proudly. His master simply rubbed his head as he took out some more things that he bought. From the friendly merchant, he got quite a few items, including two strange gauntlets with a deck of cards inside them. She decided not to question her familiar, as he probably knew more than she ever could.

"Well, at least you didn't empty my wallet…" Louise sighed as she slumped back onto her bed. "Hey, Anser?"

"Honk?"

"I think… I'm finally understanding how my magic works. I… I actually cast a spell today without your help!"

"Honk? Hjönk Hjönk!"

"I know! I just… I just recalled the feeling that happened the last two times, when I first cast the Transmutation spell and the Daifunka. Admittedly, I tried using Daifunka more. I kept exploding like I usually did. Then, something snapped inside me, and I let loose my spell the moment I lost my magical concentration!"

"That's great news Pinkie!" Derf piped in. "But with all that talk, you seem distressed. What happened?"

"…I think… I think Siesta might've been right. About my element."

"Oh. Oh…" The room fell silent. If Louise's suspicions were correct, it would explain so many things about her. But at the same time, it went against everything she's ever learned as a child. It was a moral struggle within her own mind, one she felt she had to keep silent about. And all Anser and Derf could do is be on the sidelines, watching from the outside. Finally, Louise spoke again.

"Sorry for souring the mood, today has been dreadful for me. I like your new look though, Derf."

"Why thank you, Pinkie! That might be the first nice thing you've said to me!"

"And I immediately regret it." She groaned. She turned onto her stomach as she stared at Anser. "By the way, did you two see Siesta when you were coming in? I haven't seen her all day." Anser shook his head.

"We haven't seen her either. Maybe she's busy with chores?"

"Honk."

"No… that can't be it. She would tell me, or at least I'd find her easily… where did she go?" Suddenly, Louise's door was hit by frantic banging. Louise jolted up as she went to open the door. "Just who in the world do you think you- Chef Marteau?"

"huff, huff… Louise… It's Siesta… That… huff… Count Mott…" The head chef was slowly trying to catch his breath, but it was clear he was panicking hard. "Oh, Founder almighty…"

"Chef Marteau, what happened to Siesta?!" Louise cried. Marteau simply cast his gaze down as he took off his hat.

"Count Mott bought her from Osmond's care. He's taking her away as his personal maid. I heard what he does to the girls he has. Please, you have to help Siesta. She's like a daughter to me, and you're the only noble I know of that has the heart to reach out to a commoner like her. If not for me, do it for her!"

Louise's mind shut down for a few seconds as she registered what happened. Then, her anger began welling up inside her. 'Rule of Steel Louise, Rule of Steel', she tried to reprimand herself mentally. But whenever she did, the image of Siesta appeared in her mind, causing her rage to boil over. Her eyes darkened as she stared at the man before her.

"Marteau." She began. "I'll bring her back, safe, and sound. I'll make sure that sleaze of a messenger never touches another woman again. I swear on my mother's name." and with that, Louise grabbed her cloak and left, followed by an equally determined Anser and Derf. Chef Marteau watched in amazement as tears began to well up in his eyes.

"Godspeed, milady. And give him hell."

**The Raid on Count Mott's palace begins! A bit on the shorter side, but I'll make it up to you guys next chapter. I'm back from the dead by the way! Gonna keep trying to write when I can. Anna is going to be a very important character for Anser in the long run. She'll definitely bring a lot more to the table than just mere junk. By the way, 510 Follows and 442 Favorites! Whadda Heck! I never thought this would be so popular, thanks for all the support guys! Don't forget to drop a review and tell me what you enjoyed about the chapter, and any constructive criticism is accepted. **

**That's all for now, See ya!**


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